Episode 1378: Fifty Shades Of Lunacy

So despite its being the literary sensation of 2012 (and I use the term 'literary' extremely loosely), I've managed to avoid laying eyes on the actual text of the monstrosity that is the Fifty Shades trilogy. This has all changed now, since courtesy of this blog post, I've finally had my first encounter with the lunatic prose of Fifty Shades Of Grey. It is basically unreadable, and I'm now more disgusted than ever with Vintage for reissuing the books. (Couldn't they at least have created a new imprint for them, since their phenomenal success clearly indicates that erotic fan fiction is what's going to save the publishing industry? Hey, let's be really unsubtle and just call it Literotica...'or something', to quote the stellar prose of the first book.) I also really hope that this gossip site article is just plucking figures out of the air because if those numbers for what E. L. James is earning are even remotely in the ballpark of accuracy, I might as well just drop out of university now. Academia schmacademia. I'm going to start writing BDSM fan fiction of The Hunger Games and get rich. See you later, suckers!