Episode 513: Just Me And My Ego Today...

I finally wrote the poem, but having written it, it's failed to live up to that luminous vision of it I had in the Library yesterday. It bothers me, naturally, but at least I've worked the idea out in some form. I also took out an old unfinished piece from that time when a bunch of us creative writers traipsed down to London, and finished it. Didn't really change much apart from a few words here and there to tidy it into a heptasyllabic piece. I also spent the better part of the afternoon sending stuff to magazines/websites. Not going to say too much in case nothing comes of this flurry of e-mails, but I'll be quite saddened if all 21 poems and two short stories were rejected. I'll know anywhere between a fortnight to six weeks. I don't really know how to explain this sudden desire to be published, since the last time it happened, the euphoria lasted about a day and after that it just became an anecdote to trot out in conversation. (Not that the majority of people I'm acquainted with would react much beyond a polite phrase or two. I don't blame them though. How can I, when what they're doing seems so much more meaningful, even (dare I say it) to myself sometimes?) It would be nice to receive some form of external validation via publication, if only to secure a minuscule footnote in literary history. I'll take whatever I can get.