Episode 918: The Curious Case Of Jacqueline Howett

I think the Internet just made my day. Recently, we had Rebecca Black's annoying 'Friday' going viral. (In all fairness, she didn't write the song and she's only 13, so she really doesn't deserve to be crucified by total strangers.) Now a contender for a literary counterpart has emerged in the comments thread of a book review blog. I should note that her self-published novel doesn't sound like the sort of thing I would want to read anyway (and she is also a terribly bad poet), but the review seemed forgiving enough. I mean, I've been reviewing for a while now, and I suspect if I had had to review this book, I would've been a lot harsher, given its flaws. Case in point: I'm baffled as to how Jacqueline Howett is unable to see that the two sentences cited are clunky constructions. Her attempt to use her 'style and being English' as a defence is just plain ridiculous, and honestly, I find it rather insulting both as a writer and a reader. Her reaction as the thread developed was hilariously unprofessional, and I would be lying if I said that I didn't enjoy the train wreck immensely. The poor woman was probably having a meltdown, since no one in their right mind would have carried on like that if they wanted to have any sort of future career in writing. As the Internet has pointed out though, she could always write under a pseudonym. Until the next bad review comes her way anyway. Winter 2011, since that's when Howett plans on offering up the worthy tome of literary genius that will be her second novel.